


Little Things

by SassyCat (sassy_cat)



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Fluff and Angst, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-03-01
Updated: 2012-03-01
Packaged: 2017-10-31 23:19:15
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,809
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/349436
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sassy_cat/pseuds/SassyCat
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Harry wants a chance to experience the Christmas holidays in ways that have always been denied to him, and he wants a chance to fall in love.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Little Things

**Author's Note:**

> This was a pinch hit for hh_sugarquill's holiday gift exchange on LJ.

Harry settled in at his table in the Three Broomsticks and started sipping his Butterbeer. He glanced over at the extra one he'd ordered, still full, and hoped that it wouldn't go to waste. As he watched the door, he could see the window panes frosted over, beads of water running down them, as the chilly, damp air from outside met the tavern's warmth.

Biting his lip, he fiddled with his mug and wondered if that was what happened when someone who'd never known passionate love found it. A dormant heart bombarded with sudden warmth would surely react just as strongly. It was no wonder he felt as if he was drowning these days because he was sure that what he was feeling was that kind of love. 

He'd become a lot more philosophical lately thinking about things like the window panes. All his friends except Hermione believed he'd gone barmy like Dumbledore, but Hermione seemed pleased and defended him. He didn't care what his friends thought; as hard as the war had been on each of them, there were some things they would never understand. 

Now that he didn't have a madman after him, Harry found he understood what Hermione saw in books and serious conversations. He didn't mind taking a minute or so to ponder small, unimportant details. He'd made up his mind to begin experiencing every tiny thing that he'd been missing because of Voldemort and the Dursleys.

Oh, he knew he was never going to be Hermione's kind of smart, but he wasn't going to go through life without considering all his possibilities either. He smiled as he thought of the other reason that he'd started to read more, and he looked around the tavern feeling a strange combination of contentment and anxiety mingling in his gut. Harry really wished he'd show up soon.

So many people were out in Hogsmeade running last minute errands, juggling packages as they shopped, that it would be hard to find anyone in the crowd. The Three Broomsticks was bustling with people in festive robes and pulling wizard crackers. He hoped that the trip down to the tavern would be considered worth his bother; Merlin, but everyone knew the man was difficult.

If Harry had to spend the afternoon alone, it was really going to hurt. This was the first Christmas where he had a chance to do things like a normal person. He wanted to sing carols, drink cocoa topped with whipped cream, hold hands as they shopped and adjust his lover's scarf against the cold. He didn't want to be alone anymore.

Sipping his Butterbeer, he tried to act as if he wasn't worried and thought back to how it had all started. He'd known the minute that he found out that Severus Snape was alive that he had to try and become friends with the man. He was a living connection to his mum and to Dumbledore, not to mention that he'd misjudged him so badly that he knew he had to try and make it all up to him. 

Of course, that first reaction had been a mixture of guilt and not wanting to let go of the few good people from his past, but Snape had set him straight right away. He wasn't going to be anyone's friend out of pity or obligation. He'd had enough of both and could Harry please leave him to live in peace. 

It had taken a lot of visits to Spinner's End and enduring quite a few hexes before Snape had agreed to go down to the local for a pint. That was a turning point and Harry knew that he'd been right. Snape wanted a friend just as much as he did; he was just scared and didn't mean half of the things he said.

Now Harry knew better than to listen to Snape's words, especially when he was being an arse. He watched his face, his body language and those dark eyes. Somewhere along the way, Harry had really started to enjoy looking into Snape's eyes.

Snape blushed the first time he'd caught him at it, and honestly, that was when Harry, himself, had first realized the truth of it. They were at the pub near Severus' house as usual and without thinking, he'd blurted out, "I think that I like you and not as a friend."

In response, Snape had choked down a laugh before frowning at him and replying, "Don't be absurd."

It had made for an awkward night where neither of them had known quite what to say, but Harry had watched Snape closely and he hadn't tried to run away as he had when Harry approached him about friendship. He'd just sat there scowling and gripping his glass.

For Harry, that was as much of an admission of interest as he needed. Once he'd admitted his attraction to Snape, he knew it was the truth. He realized that he preferred spending time with him over anyone else and that Snape hadn't complained about him coming around in a long time.

He would never forget the day he told Hermione and Ron that things had changed and he thought he'd found someone. Hermione had given him a knowing smile and then punched Ron in the arm when he'd asked, "but what about Ginny?"

Funnily enough, Snape had asked the same question; although, in a much more Snapeish way, 'what of your dalliance with Miss Weasley' wasn't something that he could ever imagine Ron saying.

His answer to both had been the same. "We're just friends and she knows it."

It was a big gamble being honest with Snape; if he'd thought the man hesitant to be his friend, well, that was nothing to how resistant he was about risking their friendship with 'hormonal indiscretions' … really where did he get that stuff? No one but Snape talked like that.

Glancing down at his watch, Harry was starting to feel a little panic about Snape deciding not to come. It wasn't as if he'd outright agreed in the first place. It was just a drink in Hogsmeade; although, it would be their first outing, even as friends, in a wizarding establishment.

Running his finger down the side of his mug, Harry drew a little question mark on the glass. What would happen if Snape refused to be seen with him in Hogsmeade? Would they ever have a chance at a future? Had Snape decided to push him away again?

He was so lost in his thoughts that he jumped when he heard a deep voice beside him ask, "Must you scribble on everything?"

Harry jumped up from the bench, grinning foolishly and saying louder than he'd intended, "You came!"

Snape rolled his eyes before answering, "You really are a master of the obvious, Potter." Hovering in classic Snape fashion, he went on, "Are we going to continue with this foolishness, or have you come to your senses?" Harry wilted a bit at that, but took a good look at Snape. His hands were clinched tight and his shoulders rigid. He was nervous!

Harry strengthened his resolve and made sure he spoke with a firm voice as he answered, "I am." As Snape's reply was only a raised eyebrow, he realized his answer made no sense. Quickly he added, "I mean I'm going to go through with this … not that I'm coming to my senses because there's nothing crazy about wanting to do this or be with you." Realizing he was only making it worse, he added softly, "Oh bloody hell, Snape. You knew what I meant!" 

Snape looked amused and took a seat on the bench gesturing for him to sit beside him. "Eloquent as always, Potter. I'd like to begin _this_ by stating once again that pursuing it is madness. It will never work."

Harry didn't care what he said; he was here and he was going to give them a try. He could be as negative as he wanted. Pushing the untouched Butterbeer toward Snape, he felt a deep satisfaction as he carefully brushed his fingers against Snape's hand.

Six months ago, he'd have been hexed for that. Harry smiled as he glanced up at Snape who was carefully looking around to see if anyone had taken notice of them. That wasn't going to do. He needed to get Snape to relax … well, relax for Snape.

There were too many things that Harry wanted to do with Snape before Christmas. He may as well break the ice. Just as Snape took a nice, mouthful of his Butterbeer, Harry asked, "So Severus, what do you think of caroling?" 

Beside him he heard a quick inhale then a choking cough. Waiting patiently and not daring to look at Snape, he casually sipped his own drink. When the coughing stopped, Snape growled roughly, "I'd imagine you already know."

Smiling and still not looking over, Harry replied, "Ah yes, Muggle London _would_ be the best place to go. You're right, of course; no one would know us there."

Snape froze and Harry could feel the intensity of his stare as he menacingly whispered, "Potter."

Turning to face him, Harry gifted him with a genuine, expectant smile and really hoped that Snape would recognize how much he wanted this. They'd talked about how messed up their early lives had been, and he needed Snape to understand that this was one of those things, one of the countless little things that they'd been cheated out of experiencing.

Harry's heart soared when he saw Severus' resolve beginning to crumble. Harry knew he wanted to experience 'normal' things as much as he did. He just needed to be hounded into doing them. Pushing his Butterbeer away, Severus said carefully, "I have to be back at the castle before curfew. We will neither speak of this nor will you tell your friends."

Harry grinned and extended his hand, longing for Snape to take it as they left. Relief washed through him as Snape slid his hand possessively around his. Letting Severus lead them out of the tavern, Harry quietly said, "Thank you for doing this, Severus. We can do one of your things next time."

Severus squeezed his hand purposefully and gave him a soft look before answering, "I find that I'm perfectly content."

Harry glanced down at their joined hands and felt his chest ache. They'd both missed out on so much. Harry decided not to mention that holding hands was one of his things too. Feeling brave or just reckless, Harry teased, "In that case, maybe we can go ice skating tomorrow."

In the street, Snape suddenly stopped walking and a witch bumped into Harry, glaring at both of them as she passed. "Potter, you're ridiculous," was all Snape said before pulling him close and Apparating them away to London.

 


End file.
